Recently, Shia LaBeouf has come out and said that he was raped. A number of people have made comments along the lines of “Why didn’t he do anything?” and “Did he say ‘no’?” Some have even laughed about it. But this is no joke.
Whether you like LaBeouf as an actor, or think he’s not a very good person, doesn’t matter. Nobody deserves to be raped. And assuming he’s lying or deserved it is victim blaming. Shia LaBeouf is the victim in this case. And he deserves to be treated with the same respect that all victims deserve.
He’s also been accused of lying and attention seeking. That may very well be the case. But does that mean his accusations shouldn’t be taken seriously? Of course not! False rape allegations still only make up 2% of all rape allegations. And this is a serious issue. His accusations should be looked into. He shouldn’t just be brushed off as a liar with no investigation. That’s not how we determine what’s true.
And I can’t help but wonder why people think he would lie about being raped to get attention. Rape victims don’t usually get treated well, and they aren’t often believed, so it’s a good way to get blamed, but not a good way to get any sort of positive attention.
This is the type of shit women face after being raped. Why would anybody want this kind of attention?
December 1st, 2014 at 3:04 pm
I completely agree, I wrote about the importance of consent over on my blog but I could not agree more, regardless of gender, rape is a serious crime that has to be taken seriously in all accounts, it is devastating that some people are so incredibly ignorant and choose to call him a liar instead of taking his cry for help seriously.
December 1st, 2014 at 1:32 pm
Spot on commentary… thank you for sharing.
November 30th, 2014 at 7:24 pm
I read a few comments last night that were very disturbing. One in particular where a man said she should have killed him too. Others just blabbering on about how men can’t be raped, etc. Whether it is factually true or not, their attitudes were terrible.
November 30th, 2014 at 7:25 pm
That’s quite scary, actually. Why would anybody think “she should have killed him” is appropriate?
November 30th, 2014 at 6:40 pm
I don’t follow celebrity news, so this is the first I’ve heard of this story. I agree with you that any report of rape should be taken seriously.
November 30th, 2014 at 12:13 pm
Given the fact that Cory came out with a book stating that he was raped by men in the entertainment industry and ke$ha too, its not surprising that Shia has come out. These things do happen in this industry which is why some of this celebrities start doing drugs and alcohol and we see them having breakdowns.
November 30th, 2014 at 10:29 am
Rape is rape regardless of the gender. Feminists should take this seriously. The rape culture that has been created can only be blamed for those who are not taking this seriously.
November 30th, 2014 at 4:06 pm
I don’t know why your saying feminists should take this seriously, Feminist are taking it seriously, but it is a new news story so it’s still making the rounds.
More over we are Feminists, and we are taking it seriously.
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November 30th, 2014 at 4:53 pm
Feminists? What say HUMANS should take this seriously?
November 30th, 2014 at 8:10 am
I hadn’t heard about this, but if it’s true it should be taken seriously. From what I’ve read there are two things working against Shia. First his recent history and some of his strange behavior. Second, the rape allegation is still very confusing, although his collaborators on the art project confirmed it happened. Ironically this happens to a lot of women who are raped also. No one deserves to be raped.
November 30th, 2014 at 12:25 am
If sex is non consensual, by either gender, then it is a traumatic assault upon a person’s most intimate ‘self’, a ‘self’ which should only be given by mutual agreement. There is no intimacy, just power and control. Poor man, for him to even admit happened it must have been horrific
November 29th, 2014 at 7:12 pm
Agreed! Actually some of the above comments are why I prefer the term “sexual assault” rather than “rape” b/c of the all the assumptions that surround rape, like it must mean penis + vagina, or maybe anus or mouth, nonconsensual penetrative sex is worse than other kinds of unwanted activity etc. To me it’s not what specific act it was that matters, it’s that it was done non-consensually. It’s wrong period, and should be taken seriously regardless of the genders of the people doing it.
November 30th, 2014 at 12:21 am
I prefer rape because people hear sexual assault and thing “What exactly happened? Did they get raped, or was it ‘just’ street harassment.” People take rape more seriously. Plus I think it’s important to get rid of the taboo that only women get raped. Maybe if we say that a man got raped in cases like this people will stop assuming that men can’t get raped.
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November 29th, 2014 at 6:05 pm
People are sick… poor guy 😦
November 29th, 2014 at 5:18 pm
Rape accusations should always be taken seriously
November 29th, 2014 at 4:21 pm
I will admit to being a bit naive, but I’m not understanding how it is physically possible for a woman to rape a man. He would have to be restrained, physically, chemically or under threat, and that would seem to be an inhibition to being in a condition where rape could occur. What am I missing?
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November 29th, 2014 at 4:42 pm
The first thing you are missing is that rape doesn’t have to involve different genders; a man can rape a man, and some statutes even allow for women raping women.
Secondly, rape is now getting defined broadly enough that in some places any sexual stimulation of a person’s genitals by another constitutes sex. If that contact is without consent of one party, there is by definition a rape.
Therefore, women can rape men by forcing them to engage in cunnilingus, or they can rape men by forcibly stimulating their genitals, or by slipping them date rape drugs so they don’t remember who they slept with, or by penetrating them with a crude instrument or sex toy.
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November 29th, 2014 at 5:38 pm
I was not missing that same sex rape was a possibility. In this case, Shia claimed it was a woman who raped him.
Is there a date rape drug which does not affect a man’s ability to become aroused? That would certainly make it possible for a woman to rape a man (in all senses of the word). In this case, there did not appear to be any evidence that Shia was drugged.
By the extended definition of sex, the woman could have stimulated his genitals, although it would seem she would have had to be physically superior, had a weapon, or an external threat in order to succeed AND be considered to have been rape.
Neither the mouth or anus is a “genital”, so there appears to be a weakness in that definition which would exclude:”forcing him to perform cunnilingus” or “penetrating him”. from being considered rape. I’d certainly call that second action rape. Perhaps the definition could be simplified and and broadened to “any physical sexual contact without consent?
November 29th, 2014 at 5:55 pm
I gave a very broad definition that does not reflect the specifics of different state and federal laws. Some states actually include the mouth and anus in the definition of genitals for rape statutes. Others only require that one person’s genitals is stimulated. Others require other specifics.
The broader point, which I think you missed, is that women can rape men, despite what a person’s preconceived notions of what rape should look like. To put the shoe on the other foot, it would be like me being bewildered that a six-foot tall woman could get raped by a four-foot tall man because my preconceived notions can’t fathom a scenario in which it could happen.
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November 29th, 2014 at 7:00 pm
Even with my original definition of rape, I can conceive of it happening, and even can think of a few ways it could be made to happen. It is just that because of the effort required and uncertainty of achieving whatever the goal for the act is, it would not seem to be very common.
November 30th, 2014 at 12:18 am
Men can be raped by women. And drugs aren’t necessary for a rape to occur. There are many reasons why a person might not do anything. Some people just freeze out of fear (and yes, men can be afraid of women). Some people just feel too ashamed to do anything. This is especially the case with men, who are told that they can’t be raped by women and they want sex all the time anyway and they should just be happy they got some and they’re weak if it happens to them. Women often don’t do anything because women are generally told not to do anything.
In this case, there was no drugs used. Given the circumstances, there’s a good chance he was simply manipulated, another common reason why people do nothing.
November 30th, 2014 at 12:35 am
Yep, that’s what men tend to be told. Not by anyone who matters, but by most entertainment media. I’m not sure how often “fear” enters into the equation of male victims, since fear tends to inhibit arousal. Of course, anal rape can have a high likelihood of fear, otherwise freezing out of disbelief or no idea what to do about it seems more likely for a male victim.
November 30th, 2014 at 12:39 am
I’m sure every person who gets raped feels some level of fear. Nothing like being put in a situation where you feel helpless to elicit a fear response.
December 1st, 2014 at 6:14 pm
“I’m not sure how often “fear” enters into the equation of male victims, since fear tends to inhibit arousal.”
This makes it sound like if the man doesn’t orgasm or get erect, it’s not sex, and therefore not rape. If you’re saying that, I should mention that that’s an extremely limited definition to use.
He could be anally penetrated, forced to perform an act for someone, or all sorts of things that don’t involve genital stimulation for himself. Not that stimulation or arousal for the victim factor into this at all. The only factor is consent.
A woman doesn’t have to be aroused by what’s happening for it to be considered rape, she just had to have not given consent, and the same is true with a man. No consent = rape.
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December 1st, 2014 at 10:34 pm
What I was trying to say was that fear tends to work against arousal, thus making it more difficult to use this as a methodology if the goal was fornication rape of the man. It could be very useful for any of the other types of rapes of a man which I was reminded of.
December 5th, 2014 at 2:17 am
Male sexual response is to some extent involuntary (as is female). To say (as you seem to be) that a man who achieved an erection must have wanted it is no different to saying a woman who got wet must have wanted it. Just looking at videos of chimpanzees having sex can make a vagina wet. This does not mean she finds them sexually attractive, it just means her body is preparing itself for sex. It’s no different to pumping out adrenaline when watching an action movie in a cinema. There is no rational reason to do this but the body cannot help it.
But women who rape men can’t always get them to have an erection and they have been known to insert pens and other objects into the man’s penis in order to make the man stiff. I kid you not. We seldom hear about male rape, or female rapists, in the media because (ironically) we actually DO live in a ‘rape culture’ when it comes to the rape of boys/ men…..not so when it comes to the rape of girls/ women. Society is ANYTHING BUT apathetic when it comes to the rape of girls/ women which is the most taboo crime out there.
As for the idea that rape is “the absence of yes”…. this is insane and dangerous. Consent for sex is negotiated almost exclusively NON VERBALLY. It’s just one of those things. If consent requires us to say out loud “YES I WANT TO HAVE SEX” then most sex happening in the world is rape, and most people are rapists as well as rape victims.
It is a sad fact that sex positive (Beyonce/ Spice Girls style) feminism has completely trivialised the age old mating rituals designed primarily to negotiate and establish consent and it has redefined these massively important rituals to be regarded as a form of hedonistic entertainment to be enjoyed by young feminist women. These rituals include dress, body language, dating, dancing, making out, buying and being bought drinks/ meals/ gifts etc, going back to his/ her place for ‘coffee’ etc etc.
If men just walked up to women that they wanted to have sex with and said “Do you want to have sex?” the human race would soon become extinct.
All the rituals listed above are how men and women gradually and progressively (and non verbally) seek/ give consent for sex over the course of an evening …. or even over several dates. The whole point is to do it in a public space where both parties have plenty of opportunities to walk away from the deal, or put negotiations of pause for a while without being under any pressure.
But feminism treats these negotiations as ‘party time’ for women – as if men go out socialising with the expressed intention of entertaining women and making sure they have endless free drinks. Feminism tells women that if a man offers to buy your drinks “Just accept the drinks and have fun, you are under no obligation – you are a free spirit! Girrrrl powerrrrr!”
This is all very well but it does mean the issue of consent is pushed further and further back throughout the evening …..perhaps until both parties are well and truly drunk and quite possibly aroused. For these ’empowered’ young women enjoying all the flattery, attention and free stuff the issue of consent might only enter their minds when back at his place making out on the couch when he tries to initiate full blow sex. By this time the she has probably allowed him to buy her loads of drinks and pay the cab fare to his place. She has taken up his entire evening and emptied his wallet and naturally she feels a certain sense of obligation to now have sex…..seeing as how that is what the man has been asking for all evening…..
In other words she knows that if she backs out now she exposes herself for being a cynical exploiter of men. A drunken parasite who pretended to be ‘up for it’ so she could be entertained and flattered all evening and have a dancing partner to make her feel sexy like Beyonce.
So she goes through with sex, which is not that hard in her drunken and aroused (but confused and conflicted) state.
From the man’s point of view he has just spent all evening asking her for consent in increasingly blatant ways and she has spent the entire evening answering back “yes, yes, yes, yes , yes I’m up for it” by accepting all of his drinks, small talk, dancing with him, making out with him, agreeing to come back to his place etc etc.
The next morning she regrets everything (and perhaps so does he) and at this point ‘Girrrrl power’ Beyonce feminism gives way to ‘women are wretched weak powerless victims’ feminism. This ‘morning after’ brand of feminism encourages her to cry ‘rape’. And if she does the entire legal system, media and society will be on her side and will view the guy as guilty until proven innocent.
This is no way represents all scenarios labelled as ‘rape’. But women like this are an increasing reality and they make it much harder for everybody else to negotiate sex. When women genuinely are raped they are much more likely to be ‘victim blamed’ thanks to irresponsible immature nightmare princesses giving all women a bad reputation.
Irresponsible, self entitled, hedonistic, air headed, sex positive ’empowered’ feminist girls like this are a danger to themselves AND to every man they encounter. They have the power to destroy a man’s entire life and condemn him to years locked up in a cage ……where he will of course be repeatedly raped.
And all because they refuse to take the age old dating/ mating rituals for consent negotiation seriously.
And the sickest part is that the more young women become incapable of negotiating consent, and the more they end up having regretful train wreck sex followed by morning after regrets and feelings of shame, confusion, fear and anger… the more feminism thrives. Feminism as a movement, a political force and as big business absolutely thrives on sexual dysfunction and the increasing disconnect between men and women. Go figure.
Anyway those are my views on feminism’s ‘rape culture’. Encouraging women to understand and respect the language of consent (which is primarily a non verbal language) is not the same as ‘victim blaming’.
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December 5th, 2014 at 3:29 am
Women who are raped are often called liars. If they are believed, they are asked what they were wearing, or how else it could be their fault. They are told that they are sluts and whores. But you don’t think rape culture exists against women? Rape victims are treated badly. Period. Rape culture exists. Period. As for sex positive feminism, why shouldn’t women have a say as to when sex happens? A woman’s body is nobodies but hers. And consent can be taken away at any time. All ready in the middle of sex? If she (or he) says no, then all bets are off. And if either, or both, are drunk, then consent cannot be given. It’s really not that difficult. Sex is more than just a ritual. It involves two or more human lives. All parties have a say in what happens, and nobody has a right to anybody else’s body. I don’t care what signals you thought you were getting. You don’t own other people. You can’t demand anything of them. And if you can’t comprehend the idea of consent, then you’re not trying.
December 5th, 2014 at 5:38 am
Very insightful. I can’t say I completely agree with you, but you bring up some things I had not thought about.
December 5th, 2014 at 11:11 am
I am certainly aware that a man cannot always get an erection when he wants one, and even more so that he cannot prevent one when he does NOT want one. I did not intend to say otherwise.
Your comments following make a lot of sense.
November 29th, 2014 at 3:58 pm
I cannot believe people still react like that. It’s disgusting! Men seem to get treated worse than women when they are victims of rape. The implication that they did nothing to stop it is ridiculous and insulting to the victims. It a lot of people make this insinuation. It’s repugnant!
November 29th, 2014 at 3:48 pm
Rape culture really ticks me off, particularly when it actively hurts people. I don’t understand why people are so eager to deny that stuff like this happens. Is it because they can’t handle the truth? Or do they just not care? Ugh.
November 30th, 2014 at 12:38 am
When would rape NOT hurt the victim? I’ve heard the concept that penetrating rape is “more violent/vicious” than murder.
November 30th, 2014 at 12:51 am
Rape *culture*, not rape itself. Rape is awful and is one of the few things I think deserve the death penalty. Rape culture is the pervading sense that rape is nothing serious/prominent/not like *that*, and when that turns around and ends up getting someone actually raped because the rapist doesn’t believe they’re going to face any consequences, then that makes me utterly furious.
November 30th, 2014 at 2:39 am
To carry what you said (which I liked) a little further. Rape culture isn’t rape itself, but I see it as the acceptance, and sometimes open permission of rape by the culture in question. It’s worse than rape, it not only leads to rape but results in wide spread rape, and the ignoring of it’s effect of victims.
It is most vile.
November 29th, 2014 at 3:35 pm
Reblogged this on Human Interest.