Tag Archives: lgbt

We Seem to Have Disappeared…

Withteeth and I haven’t been posting very regularly lately, but we do have a good reason. Our conference took place on Saturday, so a lot of our time went into that. Right now we are still in the process of recovering from the insanity.

However, we haven’t forgotten about the blog. Right now we are working on a large series. The series will go as follows: First we will do an atheism 101 where we will do a comprehensive overview of everything atheism that we deem important. This is meant to create an understanding between ourselves and our readers, as well as to educate theists about the topics of atheism that they might find the most confusing, and to give new atheists or those questioning their theism the resources necessary to make an informed decision about their stance and the words needed to express their views to others. Then we will do a Philosophy 101. This series will cover a vast array of topics in philosophy that will help our readers understand where we are coming from when we discuss philosophical ideas and how your ideas can best be expressed to us. Basically, this will be another way to eliminate miscommunication between ourselves and our readers. Then we will each do two separate 101’s: History and Biology. I will be discussing what history is, why it’s important, and what historians do in order to create an understanding of how historians come to the conclusion that certain events happened a certain way. Withteeth will be discussing Biology in an attempt to express why we do not accept creationism as well as to create a mutual understanding of what certain terms mean. Then we will collaborate once again on a couple more 101’s. First we will do a Feminism 101. Again, this will be to educate our readers about certain terms and to eliminate any misunderstandings about what certain terms mean. It will also be a way to express why we are feminists and why we find MRAs and Anti-Feminists problematic. We will finish the 101 series with an LGBT 101. Again, the point will be to create a mutual understanding of terms.

Given the topics we have chosen to discuss, a number of our posts will basically be repeats of old posts, however, we feel it is important to go through those topics again. We have two reasons for doing this series: first, it ensures that we can cover those topics that we have been meaning to get to but have not yet discussed, and second, it will help us create blog posts that we can refer back to when people ask us questions or make comments that we have dealt with multiple times in the past.

This is going to be a long series. the atheism one is already over 200 pages long. As such, it will likely take us the rest of the school year to complete this series. When we’ve finished this series, I will deal with all the books that I’ve put aside. This is meant to be a foundation, so hopefully the book discussions will add to these 101s.

One Last Update Before SoJo Cal

SoJo Cal1Freethinkers

The Calgary Social Justice Conference will be held tomorrow, February 14. It will be held at the University of Calgary from 10 am-5 pm. The conference will be posted on YouTube. Withteeth and I will also be posting the video here. If you would like to watch the event as it happens, you can look for the SoJo Cal page on YouTube tomorrow (unless you’re in Calgary, then you can come to the actual event 😉 ). You can also watch it at your own leisure on YouTube or right here.


Family is one of the most complicated things in life. In many ways, they can do no wrong. So long as you know they love you, you can ignore the little problems. But some times family…well, sometimes it’s tough to have them around.

I love my parents very much, and my step-dad too. I love my brother and I care about my step-brothers (though I don’t know them very well). I grew up very close with most of my extended family (there are a lot of them), and many many of my cousins are more like siblings. I have two aunts who were teenagers when I was born, so in many ways they are like siblings too. I’m glad to be so close to so many people, but I wish I were close to all of them. Unfortunately, some of my family members have isolated themselves for various reasons.

I love my family, they are relatively good people. They try to do the right thing, and they usually succeed. But I’m starting to feel myself pulling away from them. I try not to isolate myself from my family, but there is too much that I can’t tell them.

I have a very Catholic grandmother on my mom’s side. She is a wonderful woman. She is very loving and kind. She is one of those people that will welcome anybody. And, while I know she feels homosexuality is a sin, she has never once said anything bad about a member of the LGBT community. However, to my grandmother’s mind, a person has to believe in God to be good. She doesn’t care if they are Catholic, but they must be Christian. She believes that atheists are trying to ruin the country. Nothing would upset my grandmother more than finding out that I’m an atheist, so I don’t tell her. In fact, I don’t tell that side of my family. None of them are that religious, but they love to gossip. The last thing I want is for somebody other than myself to let slip that I’m an atheist. My grandma’s in her 80’s, so I figure I can tell my family after she’s gone. But it is painful to keep that part of myself from somebody I love.

My dad’s side knows I’m an atheist. They were never very religious, so they don’t care. However, they are very conservative. I can’t tell them I’m genderqueer. They wouldn’t understand. If they did, they would try to change me. They believe that gender and sex are the same thing, and they believe that the traditional gender roles should be upheld. Since my fiance is male, they wouldn’t care about the demisexuality part. As far as they’re concerned, I’m straight. They are also quite anti-feminist. I don’t keep that one to myself, but it seems that any conversations I have with them along those lines just turn into fights. In fact, I recently took my dad and brother off facebook for that very reason. They’re happy to push their views on me, but they aren’t willing to listen to my views. The same goes for my political views.

I do have one uncle on my dad’s side who is a conservative Christian. Like, Evangelical, homeschool your children, avoid all things secular, Jesus Camp Christian. He and his wife separated themselves from my family when I was about 6 when my aunt was pregnant with their first child. Apparently my uncle wanted my grandpa to make the family Christmas gathering about Jesus, but my grandpa wanted to keep Christmas about the family. They stopped visiting after that. As a result, I’ve never met my four cousins. My uncle and I tried to have a facebook relationship for a while, but it didn’t work out very well. He has terminal cancer, so I doubt there will be a chance to fix things. I’d love to meet my cousins, but, given how sheltered they are, and given their family’s views, I doubt they’d be so keen to meet me.

I have never told any of my family members about my abortion. My mom’s side would be against it and my dad’s side, while they would allow me to make the decision, would have wanted me to keep it. I wish I could have called my mom as soon as I found out I was pregnant, but that wasn’t an option for me. I had to make the decision without her.

All of the things I can’t talk about make it difficult to be close to my family. I try to visit everybody once a year, since I live quite far from everyone, but between not having money and feeling tense about saying the wrong thing and causing a fight, it’s hard to motivate myself to keep in contact with anyone. Like I said, families are complicated.

How Many Kinds of Feminism Are There?

A lot. There are a number of schools of thought within feminism, some of them are better known than others. While there is a misconception that feminism is divided as a result of these various schools, the differences between the schools are differences in methodology and not differences in their end goal. All feminists want equality of the sexes. This has always been the main goal of feminism. But different types of feminism believe that female inequality is caused by different things. Few feminists fit in to only one school of thought.

The different schools are as follows:

Liberal Feminism: Liberal feminists accept the classical liberal notion that all people are inherently rational. Since women are people, women are rational. Liberal feminists believe that it is this rationality that makes women deserving of equal treatment.


Marxist Feminism: Marxist feminists believe that the inequality suffered by women is caused by capitalism. They believe that eliminating capitalism will bring about equality of the sexes.


Radical Feminism: Despite popular belief, radical feminism is not the idea that women are better than men. Radical feminists hold to the idea that female biology (our ability to get pregnant) is what causes the inequality we suffer. According to radical feminists, equality of the sexes won’t come until childbirth and child rearing aren’t only the duty of women. Radical feminists also believe that the patriarchy is responsible for this inequality. Patriarchy doesn’t mean that each individual man oppress all women. It means that there is a system of control whereby women and women’s bodies are controlled by men. It’s a systemic problem, not an individual problem.


Socialist Feminism: Socialist feminism mixes Marxist and Radical feminism. According to socialist feminists, both capitalism and the patriarchy cause the oppression of women. Some socialist feminists believe that capitalism and the patriarchy are one in the same thing. Others believe that they run parallel to each other, both oppressing women, but in different ways.


Cultural Feminism: Cultural feminists focus on gender, not sex. They believe that it is the behaviours and traits associated with women (nurturing, caring, emotional) that cause women to be oppressed. They tend to accept these traits as real and believe that women should be given equal rights because of these traits. Cultural feminists believe that the compassionate traits of women can only improve society, and can work with the rational traits of men.


Womanist (Intersectional) Feminism: Womanist theory was developed as an attempt to make feminism more inclusive. Traditionally, feminism focused on the issues faced by middle class white women. However, women of all classes, countries, and ethnicities, as well as women/females within the LGBT community, also suffered as a result of inequality of the sexes, so womanism was born. Womanist theory points out that there is no one cause of oppression, and different women/females have different experiences, so each case of oppression is unique. As such, we must look at the intersections (of various causes of oppression) where oppression occurs. Womanism tries to avoid privileging anyone.

IFF diagram

Postmodern Feminism: Postmodern feminism is a collection of ideas. They avoid grand narratives of explaining oppression. Postmodernist feminists do not believe that there is any one cause of oppression. They also look at language and thought to see how it is masculine centered.


Third World Feminism: This form of feminism focuses on the problems faced by women in former colonies. Third wold feminists focus on the history of colonialism to determine the causes of women’s oppression.


Ecofeminism: Ecofeminism focuses on things like pollution that result from racism. For example, they point out how black and Latino communities are more affected by pollution than predominantly white communities. They then look at how women are affected by the racism and the pollution. They look at how women are hired to do certain jobs that are harmful because they can be paid less and are less likely to complain.


These are not the only feminist theories, but they are some of the best known theories. I hope this helps you understand the various types of feminism. If you would like more information, I would recommend reading Feminism by Sally J. Scholz.

Don’t forget to take my surveys if you haven’t already:

Situations that may or may not be considered Feminist issues:
Are various Feminist causes helpful or hurtful for the Feminist movement?http://kwiksurveys.com/s.asp?sid=i8d3kq6z73ems49471695
How do you perceive Feminism?
Does Feminist have a bad reputation?

Let’s Talk About Trigger Warnings


Trigger Warnings make for difficult discussions. Many people think they’re great, but others think they’re a waste of time. Any conversation about trigger warnings can go down hill very fast. And they often lead to people mocking social justice warriors. But I think the discussion is worth having.

I’m not easily triggered. I’ve been through things that would traumatize people without any real lasting affect. As such, I ofter forget to put trigger warnings on my posts. Nonetheless, I think trigger warnings are important. There are people who have gone through a traumatic event, whether recently or years ago, who are easily reminded of their trauma. Sometimes the reminder is bad enough to send them to the hospital. A lot of people say that those who are easily triggered should just get help and stay off the internet. But these people generally are getting help. Many of them see a therapist weekly, or even daily. They are on more medication than most of us could even imagine. Some even find themselves going in and out of psych wards. They are dealing with the trauma, but they will always have the scars. To tell them to get help is presumptuous and dismissive. And, what’s more, it isn’t always possible to just stay off the internet. We rely too much on it as a society. It could be the only way to contact people, it could be the main source of entertainment, or it could be required for work. So to tell someone to just avoid the internet is also presumptuous and dismissive. Especially since a person could do their best to avoid triggers and just happen across one because someone posted something on Facebook, or their was an ad in an article, or because a comment was made in a chat room. Triggers happen, and the person who experiences triggers shouldn’t be blamed or dismissed for having those triggers.

Which is why I believe trigger warnings are necessary. Trigger warnings take no time to put at the top of a post. They let anyone with a potential trigger know that they might want to avoid reading the article, but they don’t prevent anyone from reading them. Whether you experience a trigger or not, you can read posts with trigger warnings. You are in no way inconvenienced. So, if no one is inconvenienced by adding a trigger warning, and no one is inconvenienced by seeing a trigger warning, but someone could actually be harmed by the lack of a trigger warning, isn’t it best to add a trigger warning?

There is an issue with certain people being triggered by the trigger warning, but it seems to me that the trigger would be worse if they were to read the article. It has been suggested that “soft” trigger warnings could be used which go more along the lines of “Trigger Warning: r-word” instead of “Trigger Warning: rape.” I’m not sure how helpful those with triggers will find that, but, so long as people with triggers are requesting trigger warnings, I think it is only fair to add them when necessary.

What Are Feminist Issues?

I have just completed another survey in my Feminism series: http://kwiksurveys.com/s.asp?sid=xxiz033c05yo72v472614. I intend for this one to be the second last one. This survey is about what issues are considered Feminist issues. It’s longer, but it’s important for my project. Please help me out by completing and sharing my survey. Please note: it comes with a trigger warning because I do discuss rape and abortion.

Here is an update as to how my other Feminist surveys are doing:

http://kwiksurveys.com/s.asp?sid=i8d3kq6z73ems49471695 – 7%
http://kwiksurveys.com/s.asp?sid=4p48z0rwjwooxpf471689 – 6%
http://kwiksurveys.com/s.asp?sid=r4t8nurh0tyxvqt470762 – 10%

If you haven’t done any of them, please do so. And please share my surveys. The sooner I get enough results, the sooner I can share my findings. So far they are quite interesting.

My Final Survey on Feminism

I have just finished my final survey on Feminism. Please help me out by doing this survey and sharing it:


Another Survey on Feminism

I just made a second survey on Feminism. I will also be making a third one. These two are both meant to add clarification for the first survey. Please help me by doing and sharing my surveys:


The Purity Myth: Resources


I mentioned a while ago that I would be discussing the book The Purity Myth by Jessica Valenti. I have now finished the book and will be discussing it over the next few posts. But first I wanted to provide you all with most of the online resources (unfortunately a number of the resources are unavailable:


Why Are People So Concerned About Gender NonConforming Children? Part 3


The next video I watched was about a kid who doesn’t identify as male or female. The first commenter said “A gold mine for me, pay-day, and Party! It is clear that this child has been influenced by the wrong things. How do these kids know what they want in life at age 6 and 10.They haven’t even gone through puberty yet. Its a sick world we live in when a child goes to this extreme to get attention. He gets to use the nurses bathroom. What a bunch of BS. This is sick and wrong but I’m sure he/she will be featured on Oprah or Ellen show. That’s what its really about. If they can’t naturally procreate than it’s wrong.” And what exactly are the right things to be influenced by? Bigotry? Are you saying you didn’t know what your gender was at 6? If that’s the case, then we should simply avoid labelling them either gender until they’re “old enough” to know what their gender is. They aren’t looking for attention, they’re looking for acceptance. But how exactly is attention seeking sick? Right, because what child doesn’t want to use the nurses bathroom? This kid is prepubescent. No prepubescent child can procreate. Are all children therefore wrong? Or only the ones who don’t identify how you want them to? This kid didn’t say they were transgender. They may always be able to procreate. So I guess your argument is invalid.
The next person said “Anyone check to see if the kid’s parents are gay and politically motivated, or exposure to a lot of bpa and milk hormone? Nice reporting, keeping it real shallow! Instead just explore the new challenges it promotes and not the possible cause, and like a new breed of poodle, everybody should want one to be unique-Some older kids would wear a dress for bathroom privileges just to look at girls, just don’t think that’s the case. n Gay people would meet these questions as demoralizing somehow.” Um…the kid’s parents are a man and a woman. Who are currently married to each other. I suppose one of them may be gay, but why would they so openly support their child but continue to live a lie? You know why they didn’t report on what caused the child to be gender nonconforming? Because we don’t know! Were they supposed to make up lies to make you happy? And why does the story have to be about what caused to kid to be nonconforming? Why can’t a story just be about raising awareness? Trans* people aren’t a new breed. We’ve been around for a while. If a pervert ants to go into a bathroom and watch people, they can do that now. Allowing trans people to use the correct bathrooms won’t suddenly cause men to sneak into the woman’s bathroom. It allows women to use the woman’s bathroom.
The next commenter said “I wonder How Many Vaccines, Pharmaceutical drugs, over-the-counter-drugs, GMO=genetically modified organism foods, processed foods & drinks, flu shots, allergy patches, etc., this boy and/or girl, and ‘its’ parents have eaten and been Injected with?” Stop trying to make up diagnoses! Leave that shit to the people who are trained. Gender dysphoria is not caused by drugs, GMO’s, BPA, vaccines, or anything else that people want to blame all the world’s problems on. People are trans* because people are trans*. Now quite trying to use pseudo-science to excuse your bigotry. And quite calling humans “it.” We’re people, not lamps.
The next person said “Kid-‘Mommy, I want to be a girl. Can I cut my penis off?’ Mom (Liberal Retard)-‘Sure’ LMAO This is why everyone thinks Americans are stupid.” Nope. Personally, it’s people like you that tend to make me think that Americans are stupid. Well, you and the next person: “The issue isn’t that there are kids who are transgendered, the issue is that lib-tard Parents spontaneously & instantly orgasm’d when they saw the boy playing with girl gender toy & that they IMMEDIATELY rushed the child over to a pseudo-science psychiatrist who jumped up & down screaming “we’ve got one” before the boy could even walk inside the room & sit down to say what he really thinks and feels…The issue is that he’s too young & that he’s being coerced & influenced.” Oh really? You know exactly what happened do you? It couldn’t possibly be, you know, that the kid has a brain of their own and is able to express their own preferences. Because some layman from the street clearly knows more about psychology than an actual psychologist.
The next comment says “Let Ryan wait until he gets his first erection & orgasm & make his own choice before you re-enforce his sexual identity issues…He’ll probably want to keep his new toy.” Nobody’s holding the kid’s penis to a chopping block. They can’t have surgery until he’s 18 anyway. Penises aren’t the greatest toy ever, you know. A lot of men seem to think they are, but how you feel about your own penis is not how everybody feels about penises.
I might have a permanent dent in my forehead from all this facepalming…Anyway, they next person said “This is beyond disgusting. Children don’t even have a solid gender-appearance idea when they’re that age-that’s all culture. He says he’s a Tom-Girl because he’s a completely typical testosterone-driven male boy who mom and dad have exploited for some neo-liberal freak-show. You treat your children the gender they are.” What does t mean to have a solid gender-appearance? Gender expression is what you wear. So…children don’t generally wear clothes that match their gender? All gender is cultural. Again, you know exactly how this kid’s gender non-conformity went down? They were just a normal little boy playing with trucks until mom and dad decided to dress them like a girl? Because no child could possibly have a say in how they dress, right? It’s funny, conservatives bitch about how trans* people are trying to make things political, then they turn around and make things political by saying that if you support trans* rights you’re a liberal.
This next comment is another meant-to-be-positive one: “You are right. didn’t mean any disrespect towards ‘the kid’. ‘It’ = non-gender?, boy?, girl?, asexual?, transgender?, homosexual?, alien?, half Human Being, half?………” No! “It” is not a term for people. It is a term for inanimate objects. Lamps are “its,” cars are “its,” humans are “theys” or “hes” or “shes,” etc.
The next person said “‘gender variant’…that’s fucking stupid. Lame loser sicko parents are to blame, these issues belong at home, not IN school. Can’t ID yourself in an AP interview?? Then GET OFF-CAMERA!!” I hate to break it to you, but gender nonconforming kids have to go to school too. They can’t just leave who they are behind because you want them to. Hiding their identity is not an option. And quite blaming the parents. Just because you don’t understand something doesn’t mean it’s some kind of conspiracy.
The last comment I took from this video said “Old Sperm and Dried up Ovaries, this is what happens when try to have children in your 40’s Mutations, I don’t blame the child, I blame the so-called parents.” For one, the parents ages were never given. For another, gender dysphoria is not caused by a mutation. If it was, we’d have figured it out by now. Y are you blaming anyone? This kid is just trying to live their life. They didn’t do anything wrong and neither did the parents. Gender dysphoria is not a crime, and trans* people shouldn’t be treated like criminals.

In the next video, a gender nonconforming teenager sued the DMV for discrimination. The first comment I found on that video said “I think every one should be transgender. Why well if they want to stop boys from being boys in schools and feminize them so let the Libtards get their hedonistic demands. this as we see more Liberal teachers sleeping with their students, homosexuality taught at younger ages and so forth. Then they can ignorantly sit back and wonder why sh*t is falling apart and blame others for their sick and twisted depraved logic.” Some people see conspiracies everywhere, I swear. Nobody is feminizing boys in school. Do you even know what hedonism is? Trying to optimize pleasure is a bad thing? I highly doubt the political views of most teachers caught sleeping with students is even known. How, exactly, does one teach homosexuality?
The next comment said “Someone tell this fag he’s actually a boy.” Again, gender is not the same as sexuality. We have no idea what this kids sexuality is. We do, however, know that he identifies as a boy, but is gender nonconforming. He’s not transgender according to his own words.
The next person said “Here we go! Another tranny/gay/bi/who knows, on the news bitching about their ‘rights.’ The goddamn liberal agenda being pushed and screwing up our system. Why can’t a boy be a boy and a girl be a girl any more? Now anything is allowed, fuck it, you feel like a dinosaur? Well bitch loud enough about it and maybe they’ll put a “D” along side “M” and “F” on applications and exams. This shits ridiculous.” “Tranny” is another derogatory word. Don’t call people “tranny.” If you listened to what they had to say, you’d know how they identify. Should I assume that the scare quotes mean you don’t believe that the LGBT community has rights? Last I checked, all humans deserved equal rights. Boys can be boys and girls can be girls. However, now we don’t force people into those categories.
The next person said “Who cares. This fag needs to act and dress like a man.” Says who? Why should anybody conform to your preferences? Is this kid hurting you by not dressing like you?
The next comment said “There are rules in America. Even for a sissy boy like Chase” ‘Merica.
The next comment said “Woman who wear make up usually always wear make up to look like a woman. Women who wear make up are NOT trying to look like a man that is a BIG DIFFERENCE between women who wear make up and men who think they look like women who wearing make up.. Beside the guy says he nonconformist on his identity, he doesn’t know what he is and until he does, he needs to look like the person he is for his license… a guy.” So…do women who aren’t wearing make-up look like men? Why does it matter why people wear make-up? Have you ever thought that a person can wear make-up because they like to? Saying you’re nonconformist is not the same as saying you don’t know who you are. Some people just simply don’t conform.
The last commenter said “The kid should have just followed the DMV’s rules….gays are so loud and rude these days I really sympathize with the dmv…” How is it rude to say “I wasn’t treated fairly”? And, one last time, gender is not sexuality. Maybe they are gay, but that’s not really the issue here.
All of these videos were simply related to gender nonconforming children living their lives. Not a single one of them was harming anyone. None of them were forcing their views on anyone. They weren’t oppressing anyone. And yet a good half of the comments on those videos were people bitching about how trans* people shouldn’t be allowed to be themselves. And a number of those people, while they self-righteously declared that these children should be oppressed, acted as if their rights are somehow being taken away. Just because other people are given the right to do something that you can already do, doesn’t mean you’re losing any rights. And just because something is legal doesn’t mean you have to do it. You don’t have the right to force your opinions on others. Don’t like the fact that transgender people transition? Don’t transition. But don’t force your own beliefs about transitioning down their throat. If you think they’re going to go to hell for it, oh well, it’s still their choice. To quote a friend of mine, “fucking cis people.”

Click to access sexuality-definitions.pdf


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