Tag Archives: LGBTQ

SoJo Cal

Once again, a reminder that SoJo Cal is in the process of being organized. This is a conference dedicated to discussing the intersection between freethought and social justice, namely LGBT rights and feminism. If you’re a feminist, a freethinker, or LGBT (or an ally to any of those groups), please share our Go Fund Me page. Of course, we’d appreciate it if anybody shared our page, but those are the three groups most represented by our conference.

If you’re in Calgary, please check out our Go Fund Me page as it has all the information about what will be happening.

We’re still sitting at $100 of the $5000 that we want to raise. Please share, and please donate if you can. http://www.gofundme.com/ey9uy4


An Update on SoJo Cal

The U of C Freethinker’s Conference Has A Name!

And that name is SoJo Cal, or the Calgary Social Justice Conference. We are currently in the process of creating it’s logo. We also have a few tentative speakers. Four people have let us know that they’d like to speak, and we have a few more people that we’d like to invite to speak.

We also have a few workshop ideas. The first would be on being a good feminist and the second would be about trans* activism. We are hoping to run a few more workshops, so any suggestions are greatly appreciated. Our conference is on the intersection between atheism/freethought and different types of social justice, namely feminism and LGBT activism, but also interfaith activism. The goal is to get people thinking about how we can make the world a better place, and encourage people to think about how different groups can work together to accomplish that goal.

We are also still looking for donations. If you’d like to help us out, you can find our Go Fund Me page here: http://www.gofundme.com/ey9uy4. All donations are greatly appreciated.

Hollywood Transphobia

The Dallas Buyers Club, Amanda, Hit and Miss. What do all of these have in common? Despite the fact that the first two are movies and the third is a show, that is. They all have transgender characters played by cis actors. 

I’m sure that doesn’t seem like a big deal to a lot of people. Jared Leto won an award for playing a trans woman and it is only now becoming okay to have trans characters in the media. But it shows a problem within the movie/TV industries: they still aren’t willing to hire trans actors. I’ve heard people say that there just aren’t any trans actors who wanted to play those roles. I highly doubt that. Have trans people portrayed in the media normalizes trans people. That is a good thing. They could have found trans actors, but I doubt they actually looked.

I want to see trans actors playing trans characters. 

What other movies/shows have these same problems?


I posted this on my facebook awhile ago and it led to an interesting discussion, so I thought I’d post it here as well:

“Why do people say “I refuse to be a victim”? Nobody chooses to be a victim. Has your house been robbed? Then you are a victim of breaking and entering and robbery. Have you ever been jumped? Then you are a victim of assault and theft. Have you ever been harassed while walking down the street? Then you are a victim of harassment. You can’t choose not to be a victim. Does that mean that you can’t choose how to respond to the victimization? Of course not. You can still choose how you’ll respond to the event. You can choose how you’ll act. Saying “I refuse to be a victim” doesn’t make you not a victim. It just makes you someone who is buying into societal victim blaming. You are saying that people choose to be victims. You’re saying that what happened to them was their fault.”

Sex and Gender

I just had a very interesting conversation with a friend in which he posited that sex can’t be defined therefore sex and gender are the same thing. Lets pretend for a second that biologists haven’t already defined sex (males=small gametes, females=large gametes), even if there were no definition for sex, it still makes sense to divide the two. This is because sex is merely a description of biology. One is born male, female, or intersex. I think it’s a largely useless category, but many people care about it. Gender is how we feel and how we express our selves. If my sex is the same as my gender, then people can and will say “you were born a girl so you must act like one.” I know this because people who feel that sex and gender are the same do say this. But if sex and gender are different, then people are more accepting of those of us who have a gender that doesn’t match our sex. This is why sex and gender must be seen as separate.

Why Does Nobody Ever Talk About Demi-Sexuality?

When I was in high school we discussed heterosexuality and homosexuality. It seemed to be implied that you’re either one or the other. But sexuality, as I discovered in university, is much more complex than that. When I was growing up, I was quite confused. I would see a boy and think “he’s attractive,” but it never got any stronger than that. I had the same feeling towards the girls. I felt some attraction towards them, but I never felt any pull to do anything. How is someone who’s told that you’re either straight or gay/lesbian, and everybody has some level of sexual attraction, supposed to respond to those feelings? I didn’t know if I liked boys or girls and I didn’t know why I didn’t want to kiss and have sex like my classmates so obviously did. I used to wonder what was wrong with me.

In university I met people who were bisexual and asexual for the first time. That’s when I first began to learn about how complex sexuality really is. It made me happy because now I was able to say that my feelings were normal. But I still didn’t have a label for myself. When my partner and I began dating, I told him that I didn’t know what my sexuality was. I seemed to fit in a number of categories kind of, but not really. I had tried to do some research, but never found an answer. It was my partner who found out what demi-sexuality was and explained it to me. That was when I figured what what I was. After four years of high school, four years of university, and numerous classes and workshops on gender and sexuality, I finally had a name for myself. 

So why did it take so long? Why did nobody ever mention demi-sexuality? Why was I told about heterosexuality, homosexuality, bisexuality, asexuality, pansexuality, and omnisexuality, but that’s it? 

I’ve been told that demi-sexuality isn’t a really sexuality. I’ve been told that, since it only discusses how I fall in love and not who I fall in love with, it can’t be a real sexuality. But that doesn’t seem to be the case to me. In fact, that’s kind of the point of it being it’s own sexuality: how I fall in love determines who I fall in love with. With demi-sexuals a relationship is required before sexual attraction takes place. I’m not going to see some hot guy, or beautiful woman, walking down the street and think “I’d like to have sex with them.” I will notice that they are attractive, but that’s it. I need to have formed a relationship with someone before I’ll find them sexually attractive. That can mean that I’ll find my close friends sexually attractive, but usually it means that I require a romantic attraction first. As such, the sex, or gender, of the person that I’m attracted to doesn’t matter. I can fall in love with anyone, I just need to form a bond with them first.

I’ve also been told that it’s merely a sub-set of asexuality. I don’t have any problem with that. So being demi-sexual means I’m asexual. Whatever. But why then is it not discussed when asexuality is discussed. And, if demi-sexuality is a subset of asexuality, why don’t we hear about the other subsets? If it’s the only subset, why call it a subset? Why not just let it be its own category?

I have a lot of issues with my sexuality, and my gender, when it comes to how they are discussed, or rather, because they aren’t discussed. I’m technically LGBTQ with both my sexuality and my gender, but I don’t feel included it the group on either fronts. I feel ignored. My straight cis partner feels more welcome as an ally than I do as someone who is LGBT. So why does nobody ever talk about demi-sexuality? Why does any sexuality get ignored? Wouldn’t it be better if we let people know everything that we know so that they know how complex sexuality is? Wouldn’t it be best if we discussed all the possibilities so that nobody feels left out?

%d bloggers like this: